learn observe interact

暑い。。。

Rainy season has started, and we're getting rain at least 3-4 days a week now. That's annoying, but what's worse is when it doesn't rain. The temperature sky rockets, and the humidity and misery as well. I know I can't be complaining too much, it'll be worse in Cambodia. But then again, looking at our temperatures and humidity levels... not very much. It's good training though!

Today is by far the worst so far, but I know that it'll soon be worse yet... we're not even in July yet!

In other news, still preparing for moving on. Buying tickets and getting dates worked out is quite the challenge. There was some snafu with the number of days of vacation I had left, so that's put an annoying twist in well laid plans. Still, my supervisor acknowledged that my count was the correct one so we appear to be back on schedule somewhat.

Beyond that, just living life. The countdown is coming quickly, and it won't be long before I'm no longer in Japan. Hard to believe, actually. Even harder to believe is that there isn't very much of the school year left! Once this week is done, just 3 weeks until the end of term. Wow. Big wow.

But then again, aren't my blog posts around times of leaving always like this? Why am I even surprised that time growing short moves quickly?

来校

The first bell rings just as I set my foot on school property. Pushing down the handle, and swinging wide the surprisingly light gate to the student entrance means the start of another day. The green gravel that covers the sports field is always dry and hard in summer, pocked and broken at the edges by the feet of students on a rainier day. I can already see the teachers in the staff room, preparing for the day and students going about their business in their classrooms. I edge around the tennis court, as both boys and girls tennis teams made it clear at the student council run all school meeting that "shoes other than tennis shoes, are not permitted on the courts."

Stepping under the eaves of the entranceway, the speckled pink and grey soft tiles bear still the traces of the dirt that yesterday's student cleaning crew didn't quite sweep away. I feel for them though, cleaning this large entrance with tiny little brooms is horrible work. I veer left, because it's the door near the green-public phone that's opened. I step in to the smell of pine and wet feet. The pine from the main school building - desks, paneling, window and door frames are all made from trees grown in our own school forest. The feet from the three racks of shoes in front of me, slightly obscuring the carved version of our school song that hangs behind them. My sandals come off as I reach back into the left-side pocket of my backpack searching for socks. I step across the border between worlds - the space clean and the space unclean and head for my own shoe locker.

Clad and ready for the day, I make my way loudly into the staff room (for loud morning greetings are important) and head to my desk. Unpacking and starting the complicated dance of wires and settings that makes my computer function at school. Toshimi-san comes my way with my Snowman cup, now filled to the brim with fresh green tea. It rests, cooling on an Australian souvenir coaster while the morning meetings starts. The important people each say their piece, each grade theirs and then the et cetera that brings us to the bell that means the beginning of homeroom and ten minutes until the school day really starts.

後五十日間

hello neglected blog. I would apologize for never updating you, but I vowed to never to that a long, long time ago.

It's been about two months, and a lot has happened in that short time. I went back to the US to see my brother get married, I got a job in Cambodia, and so much more. It's been good, very good. Now I'm in my last few weeks here in Japan, and it's really hard to believe. It's also much more difficult to say goodbye than I thought it would be.

Leaving Benin wasn't hard for me. I was ready to go. I mean, there were hard things. I didn't like saying goodbye to all of my friends, and I didn't like saying goodbye to delicious chicken, weekly tchouk market or even zemidjans and my work. I was ready to say goodbye to some things, but it wasn't so much that I couldn't have stayed - it was just time to leave. Does that make sense?

It doesn't feel like that here. Life in Kurabuchi is easy, very easy. I'm paid well, my job is fun, my surroundings are beautiful and I love where I am. The more free weekends I have to sit on my window sill and watch the river, mountains and clouds the more I think about how much I'll miss this place.

Of course it's not unexpected. As soon as I got here, I felt that this place would always be special to me. That this was going to be a place of respite, but not something that would be permanent or even as long as I might like. I knew it was going to be a place to recharge my batteries and then leave to head off once more into the fray.

This isn't lament over the decision to move on. It was bound to happen eventually, and perhaps all the better that it happens at the peak of my love for this place. These two years in Japan will always be reflected back on as a time of great (and quiet) peace and joy.

It's all a very bittersweet experience. All at once I can hardly wait to get to Cambodia, to meet my new students, to dive into Khmer language and culture, to eat some spicy and delicious food and putt around on a scooter. (Not to mention other important things!) I love the first few months of newness in a culture. I love the deconstruction and humility you experience when suddenly you understand nothing and must learn it all again. Of course it's exhausting, but exhilarating. All of that I want to experience again, and now. Even so, it seems sad to once again lose all of the comfort I've worked so hard to gain - being able to communicate and being independent and established.

So, here I am and so the countdown truly begins. From here I have 50 days left in Japan.

sweet, sweet life

It's spring! Sakura are blooming and the dismal temperature range has shot up into the realm of lovely. I took the blanket off of my kotatsu yesterday, people have stopped reacting to me wearing short sleeves, and the windows in the staff room are open. The only disadvantage is that the sun rises so early! Well, I guess I actually would like that if I was running still. For the time being I'm taking a break and letting my body rest a bit. I'll be hitting the pavement again next week or so.

So I'm back from Cambodia! Wow, what an awesome trip. Seeing Mindy after such a long absence was, of course, wonderful. But getting to put faces to names, and to see in person her situation. We didn't really do very many touristy things, so the are still large parts of Phnom Penh that deserve exploring - not to mention things like Angkor Wat.

I also did a little job investigating while I was there, and had interviews with a couple of schools. But that actually is probably a story worth telling...

Going to Cambodia, I had sent an email to one school that looked promising. At this point, I just sort of wanted to see what they were about. So, I sent an informational interview request and met with their elementary school principal. It was good, she was really nice and it was cool to see their operation. It was a private Christian school, K-12. Unfortunately, it really didn't look like there was going to be any opportunities for me there, which was a bit sad.

The day before, while getting ice cream, we randomly bumped into a teacher at another Christian K-12 school. I got the e-mail address of their principal, but didn't really see much time to meet them in Mindy and my schedule. I thought I might send an e-mail late in the week, or maybe even when I got back to Japan. After all, I had only a couple of days left in Phnom Penh before Mindy and I were to head off to a relaxing couple of days at the beaches in Sihanoukville before I headed home. Flash forward to Wednesday, the day before we leave Phnom Penh. It was afternoon, and Mindy was showering so I was bored. I decided I may as well send the email then. But in it I didn't really give too much indication that I was in Cambodia, or that I had any time to meet, or for that matter any contact details. I was quite surprised when a couple of hours and a very strange phone chain later, Mindy was on the phone with the school principal and organizing my interview... for that evening.

It all worked out just right. We went over to the school, met with the principal and vice principal and it all went really well. I really liked them, the vision of the school and the job on the table. It's exactly the sort of job I've been praying for: Christian, Cambodians (don't want to be in a barang bubble), teaching, computers. I'd be sort of half net admin half computer teacher. The papers aren't signed yet, but things are looking very positive.

It was really one of those crazy "God's perfect timing" moments, of which there were several during the course of the week.

The whole week really just whet my appetite for Cambodia. I have to admit I was a bit jealous of Mindy! It's so exciting; learning Khmer language and culture, seeing, eating, smelling and discovering a new place. Phnom Penh really had elements of disparate familiarity. There were things that felt Japanese there were things that felt Beninese - all in a combination that was completely unique to itself. I'm sure Mindy quickly tired of hearing about Benin, because I felt like all I did was compare Cambodia to it. But no matter what, it was really awesome to tread familiar feeling but wholly different paths. I'm really looking forward to moving over there and discovering what I can for myself.


Oh, and the food was AWESOME! So good! Oh, and there was a Dairy Queen in the airport. What the heck? We don't even have Dairy Queen in Southern California! At least I know if I'm ever hankering for a Blizzard, my hunger need not go unsatisfied.

In the mean time though, I'm concentrating on loving Japan and where I am now. Not that that is hard to do, especially in light of all of the newness. My new first year students are at school, and have the bright-eyed-full-of-hope-while-still-wide-eyed scaredness that only first years can have. I'm happy that I get to be the connecting point too. I'm the only teacher that they really know here. (since I taught them in elementary as well) It's pretty fun to see them all together. We have a whole new staff as well (basically). We had 8 teachers change schools this year, so that's roughly half of our staff. It feels like a great start to a good ending. I'm really looking forward to all that's coming next.

I'm continuing my busy life of visitors with Shane and friends. They're currently visiting Kansai, but will be coming back up towards me this weekend. It's strange having such a constant flow of people in and out of my house. Fun, and occasionally tiring but, it's cool to have segments like this. Once they leave, it'll just be a matter of days before I'm back in California for a few days for my brother's wedding. (!) Then, returning from that, just a matter of about two months before I'm back in Cambodia. Wow.

marathon wrap-up

Final time 6:16:15

Not exactly even remotely close to my goal. I learned a lot though, and I know why it took me so long.

First, I was placed in K group, in the very back of the race. It was very clumped up back there, and difficult to navigate the crowd. I didn't have a good handle on the pace I was running. I was passing people so much I thought I was actually going too fast, so made an effort so slow down. I should have paid more attention to my time and not worried about what other people were doing.

My knee held out pretty well for the first 25k. Around the 25k point it started to go down hill. The one interesting thing was that I couldn't walk! I could only run. If I walked the pain was almost unbearable - but running was well within acceptable.

I think the hardest part of this was actually physical tiredness. When I ran the practice last month, I found that it was energy that was lacking, so needed to eat during the race. I did that this time, and found that energy was around - but after 4 hours of running I was very physically tired so those last two were difficult.

But wow, what an amazing experience. I wish I could describe it all and have it be understandable. Even better, to not sound cliche and lame. Running 42.195k over 6 hours was so many things. It was so incredibly lonely, yet at the same time there was such an incredible sense of community. It was just you and the road, but the entire course was lined with supporters screaming ガンバレ！('ganbarre' - "do your best!") and holding signs like "You are a hero! Never give up!". There were high-five lines, people handing out food, and giving an incredible amount of energy. There was entertainment too. Bands, cheerleaders, all sorts of dance troupes, and much more were all there for us. This isn't to mention the thousands of volunteers who gave up their time to pour drinks, peel bananas, and make sure the event ran smoothly - all on top of keeping spirits up and supporting the runners.

It was also one of the most humbling experiences I've had. I really don't know how to describe this, but I know that there was no way I could have completed this race alone. Last Tuesday I ran just 4k, and my knee was in such a state I couldn't get up stairs. There was no way it should have taken me the whole race and not be destroyed. God definitely ran this race for me - I just moved my legs.

The weather more or less cooperated - until the last bit of the race. Around the 40th kilometer the wind was horrible and blowing against us. The rain was heavy and cold and the supporters more or less left. It was terrible. Even the last 500m to the finish line were in the same vein, and even though I picked up and was running it was... emotional. I'm glad no one I knew was greeting me at the finish line! I did not look good.

Haha, but it's all done now. I learned a lot about myself and a lot about the character of God. It was an amazing experience, and I won't soon forget it. I was really touched to hear that there were people that were watching my progress through the race. Thank you all for supporting me, it really means a lot.

tokyo marathon anticipation

Sunday is the big day! 30,000 participants, 42.195 kilometers (~26 miles)

Race starts at 9 a.m. Tokyo time, which means early Saturday evening for people in CA. If you're interested, you can actually track my progress in 5k intervals at http://p.tokyo42195.org/ I'm bib number 43052. I hope somebody actually does 'watch', I'm really curious what their system is like!

My goal time is 4 hours, which I think is attainable. To get that I'll have to run at 5:42/km which happens to be right about my average pace.

If you want to see the course 'live', there is a guy running the 10k with an iPhone strapped to his head:
http://iphoningjapan.com/blog/

If you'd like to see a sped up movie of the course I'll be running:
http://www.tokyo42195.org/movie.html

I'm feeling pretty anxious actually, my left knee isn't in top condition right now... so please pray for me! I'm definitely not going to finish if I'm running this alone!

resisting information

Things like twitter, facebook, and any of the other myriad of social networking sites are being touted as the new generation. Blogs our out and mini blogs are in. 140 characters to say your piece, multiplied a few times a day and you're part of the next generation of information flow. Now, if you're not using these tools you're out of fashion. Senators, pastors, even companies. (skittles has recently replaced their homepage with a twitter feed) It's all able to be aggregated, sortable, and deliverable to any device. All of this world of content can follow you where ever you go. What content though?

I know people that update their facebook status 4-5 times a day, but with nothing to say. Yet even so, I find myself reading it and even being infuriated by it. I'll want to jump kick Tom McSomebody at 3pm because he updated his status with "Tom McSomebody is ...", but I won't jump kick him because I haven't talked to him for 5 years or more, and even when we were 'friends' it was just because we happened to be in the same class one time and he added me. I won't ban him from my news feed, I'll just silently seethe that he didn't update me with more 'important' information.

That's just the thing though, it's almost never important! Very rarely is there any actual information, it's just meta-information... and like the meta-pizza it's just making us fat. Most of us are still listening though, slowly deadening our ability to parse useful information and just knee-jerk reacting to what is pushed in front of our faces.

It's not all bad, certainly all this social networking can help build real social connections and make you more aware of the people i your life. Too often it's an excuse to not be involved though, isn't it? "I know what's going on in their lives, I write them 'happy birthday' on their wall when facebook tells me to. Why actually talk to them? Why bother finding out more than the 140 character bite sized bits of peoples lives that come down the conveyer belt?" Like our mothers warned us, we're getting so full on chips and candy we'll have soon ruined our dinners.

And what happens when someone doesn't diligently tweet, blog or make themselves known on the net. Do you forget they exist because they aren't crowding in around your internet throne begging for your attention? It's a crazy.

As much as I'd like to glorify the old days though, I can't really do that either. I like that I can talk to Mindy for no cost more than internet connectivity as much as I care to. I like that I can see what my friends are up to half way around the world during whatever time I have free. I like that I can bug friends at work, and that I can likewise be bugged.

I just wish that fully embracing new technologies didn't mean losing humanity.

This website expresses the views of Lyle Kozloff, who is entirely responsible for its content. It does not express the views of the JET Programme or any other institutions herein named or linked to.